la giacca miracolosa

I experienced one of the most embarrassing fashion faux-pas of my life with a purchase I made in New York, just prior to coming here. I was feeling like I had nothing to wear so I went to H&M to get some things that would be really "of the moment." I was with my husband, which is just as good, if not worse, than having no one else to help you. Without exception, he suggests that I buy whatever I try on because that gets us to the cash register and out of the store as fast as possible. Anything else could mean waiting in the store while I agonize over a purchase or worse yet, try something else on. I picked out a few things that looked really trendy. One was a cute little grey checked blouse with elbow length sleeves that ended in adorable bell-shaped cuffs. The collar was formed with an attached scarf that tied at the side into a bow. The trendiness of it was in the retro a-line cut. I think part of the reason I was drawn to it in the first place was that it reminded me of a shirt my mom once had. I wore it to work soon after that and the first person I saw in the coffee room stared at me with wide eyes. I started to feel a little self-conscious about my new purchase. I suddenly realized that the similar shirt my mother had was one she had worn while pregnant with my younger brother. After exchanging a few pleasantries I said, "I look pregnant in this shirt, don't I?" and my colleague said, without a second of hesitation, "Yes." She told me to look on the bright side, I could probably get a seat on the bus. I retreated to my desk and sent out an email to two of my girlfriends at work with "Help! Come quickly!" in the subject line. Caitlin was first on the scene with Joanna close behind. Drawing on our experiences trying on wedding gowns at Vera Wang we worked out a plan. We got some of those black binder clips from the supply closet and reigned in the voluminous fabric around my midriff. I felt a little silly walking around with binder clips all down my back, but I figured it was better than starting some rumors.

I knew I couldn't wear the shirt again, but I didn't have the heart to pitch it even though it was dirt cheap. I hate to waste things, and just like I always carry an umbrella to avoid being rained on, I secretly though the quickest way to pregnancy might be to throw it out. I harbored hope that I might be able to wear it with a sweater that had the right bateau neckline to show off the collar and bow, but flatten the paunchy part in the front until I needed it. I brought it with me to Italy where just like at home it has hung in the closet.

On my first excursion to pick out some Italian clothes I came upon a brand called "Comptoir des Cotonniers" in Rinascente, the big department store here. I tried on a black jacket and although it was the most expensive thing I've bought in years, I decided immediately I should make the investment. It has a bit of a swingy shape that is very current, but nothing about it is trendy. The cut is so perfect that although it isn't tight, it is incredibly flattering. It is that rare combination of unique and classic. It is made of some special cotton which the label warns you "should never come in contact with water." I guess it is no good in a rain shower but that is fine with me, I'll carry an umbrella whenever I wear it. The other day when I was preparing to go out in this jacket, I couldn't find the shirt I wanted to wear under it until I looked in the dirty laundry. I went through my closet twice looking for something else until I finally thought about the maternity shirt. I tried it on. I looked pregnant, but then I put on the jacket. The bow peaked out perfectly from the collar but the rest was hidden by the ultra flattering cut. It was nothing short of a miracle. When I called my husband to tell him I was running out and that I had finally found a way to wear the shirt that makes me look pregnant he replied, as any smart husband would, "I don't know which shirt you are talking about."